Tuesday, September 2, 2014

Spinster Food: Hot Krispy Kreme

My mom is a huge Krispy Kreme fan. I, on the other hand, prefer Murray's Donuts, The Donut Plant, and after this weekend, Revolution Donuts. This past Sunday morning, though, I woke up with a deep need to know if the Krispy Kreme hot light was on.

For those of you who aren't familiar with the Krispy Kreme hot light, let me enlighten you. My mom is the one who taught me about it, as I think it may have been a serious part of her college experience.  Basically, whenever Krispy Kreme is making hot, fresh glazed donuts, they turn this red light on in their window and on their sign that alerts all passers by to the freshness coming from their kitchen conveyor belt.

At about 8:30 AM, I drove down Buford Highway, and I saw the gleaming red beacon of deliciousness in the distance. I veered to the left, and I was in. I had eaten a doughnut the day before, so my thinking was that this extra bit of gluten wouldn't really make me look any more pregnant than I already looked. Inside, I waited for the freshest doughnut to come off the glazing belt, and I got an ice cold chocolate milk to wash it down because that seemed the most appropriate.

In my car, I knew I could wait no longer. I opened the chocolate milk, and embarked upon a journey I haven't made in at least ten years. Spinsters, I am here to tell you that a hot Krispy Kreme is galaxies away from a cold one. To say the glaze melts in your mouth is an understatement. It was like sugarplum ferries were dancing on my tongue. Or at least tiny donut men.

While I thoroughly enjoyed my warm, delicious Krispy Kreme experience, I think the fact that the hot light isn't on all the time is going to be my saving grace. If it were on all the time, I'm not sure I'd be able to fit inside my apartment.

Monday, September 1, 2014

Spinster Love: ZzzQuil

Over the past week or so, I've been having a bit of trouble sleeping. That means I haven't been able to dream of kittens nearly as much as a spinster should. I could fall asleep, but I couldn't stay asleep. I tried reading, watching TV, playing on my phone, but nothing would help. But then I went to Target, and I got some ZzzQuil. Oh, my. This stuff is good.

I would write more on this subject, but I'm actually pre-writing the night before it will post, and now that I've freely ruminated on just how pleasant ZzzQuil sleep is, I think it's about time I took some and got to bed. The fluffy kitten dreams are calling.

Sunday, August 31, 2014

Spinstergram: Labor Day Weekend So Far

This Labor Day weekend thing kind of snuck up on me. I didn't realize until Thursday afternoon that we were having a half day of work on Friday. Ever since then, though, I've been living it up. I went to have a foot massage on Buford Highway Friday afternoon, and I did some serious needlepoint on Friday evening. Keepin' it real.

Yesterday morning was the main event, though. Megan and I had a spinsterly date for donuts and the Decatur Book Festival. On the way, we discussed needlework. I'm not even making this up. I had been seeing this place called Revolution Donuts on Instagram, and it had become clear to me that a visit to their Decatur location was absolutely necessary - Gluten or no!

Spinsters, I'm here to tell you that after yesterday's Gluten time, I do look six months pregnant, but the raspberry frosted donut with sprinkles and the "Maple Cro-Dough" (a version of the cronut) were well worth a faux pregnancy.

The Decatur Book Festival was a lot of fun with a lot of free pens. We met some Authors, heard a talk about "small towns and furry friends" from some Atlanta romance writers, and best of all, there were plenty of "your face here" posters. Of course we took advantage.

To the left you'll see a photo Megan took of me next to the Romance writers' tent promoting Jennifer McQuiston's What Happens in Scotland.  I've never actually read a romance novel, but their area certainly had the best of the "your face here" photo ops. Is this guy wearing a pirate shirt or what?

For any of you who feel the need to have your photo taken in much the same way as I did, the Decatur Book Festival will still be going on today, and I bet they'll still have some excellent places to put your face....or at least your nose (I mean in a book).

Saturday, August 30, 2014

Spinster Binge: The Spoils of Babylon

Kristen-Wiig, The-Spoils-Of-Babylon, Kristen-Wiig-Face, Kristen-Wiig-Fan-Art, The-Spoils-Of-Babylon-Fan-Art
Watching the Emmys this past Monday, I found myself shocked at how many of the nominees I hadn't actually seen at all. Not having cable or HBO can actually be a problem when it comes to TV knowledge. Still, I'm not about to pay that much every month just to be in the know when I'm watching the Emmys. That's why I was quite pleased when I saw that The Spoils of Babylon had come to Netflix. As a fan of Kristen Wiig, I knew I must watch.

The premise of The Spoils of Babylon is that it's a TV miniseries based on a fictitious novel by a fictitous author, played by Will Ferrell.  The whole thing is intentionally hyper-dramatic, and it is hilarious.

And now for a few notes on why The Spoils of Babylon is awesome:

1. The Cast:
          We've all come to expect hilarity from Kristen Wiig and Will Farrell, but Tobey Maguire and Haley Joel Osment showed unexpected comic chops. Additionally, appearances from the likes of David Spade, Val Kilmer, Jessica Alba, Tim Robbins, Molly Shannon, Michael Sheen, and a whole bunch more make this a crazy all-star cast.

2. The Hair:
          This story spans several decades, and Kristen Wiig's hair, makeup, and costumes reflect all of them to the max.

3. Devon Morehouse's (as played by Tobey Maguire) Wife:
          This one is a spoiler. So don't read past this sentence if you don't want that. But Tobey Maguire's character, Devon Morehouse, gets married in this movie, and his wife is inexplicably....wait for it...a mannequin. They never discuss it. She's just there, and she's a mannequin. What's more is that she has a baby, and the baby is a real person later in the story. I can't even.

4. The Sets:
          All the establishing shots in The Spoils of Babylon are done with very obvious models. Excellent.

5. The Shots:
          This miniseries is shot in so many different ways and just sort of changes visual genres at will. You're constantly left thinking "wait what?" My favorite moment was a split screen between Kristen Wiig and Haley Joel Osment.

In case you needed to watch the trailer, I've placed it conveniently in this post!

So, if you're looking for something to binge watch this holiday weekend, might I suggest The Spoils of Babylon? It's weird and wonderful. 

Friday, August 29, 2014

Friday Fun: Queen Bey Gif

This has been a pretty long week, so I thought we should all celebrate Friday with a little bit of silliness. This looks like Beyonce as a kung foo fighter....who's also celebrating. And I think she has a reason to celebrate. It is Friday, after all!

In honor of the holiday weekend, my office is having a half day, and I'm here to tell you that I'm going to celebrate with a nap, some Netflix, and some needlework. Tomorrow, my friends, I visit the Decatur Book Festival.

Now, I know some of you are going to be mad at this next part, but I'm really feeling it today. At one of my jobs in New York, every friday morning they played this song on repeat in the cafeteria. At some point it went from being a terrible song to being somehow endearing. So, yes, I like it. Enjoy!

Does it look like that kid in the front passenger seat in the beginning has drawn-on facial hair, or is it just me? 

In case you're not feeling that video, I think you will like this next one. Because I love it. Especially because there's a Rebecca Black cameo. 

Ok, hooray for Friday! Enjoy!

Thursday, August 28, 2014

Spinster Screening: The Hundred Foot Journey

cooking-illustration, whisk, curry, the-hundred-foot-journey-movie
I love Indian Food, so when I saw the previews for The Hundred Foot Journey, I was thrilled. The only problem was that the previews came out long before the movie hit theaters. To occupy myself, I listened to the book on tape, which was very good, but then, I feel like the book that gets made into a movie is almost always excellent.

This past weekend I finally made my way to the North Dekalb Mall to see The Hundred Foot Journey, and I must say I was not disappointed. The movie in its entirety was delicious. Eating popcorn in that theater would have been shameful. On the whole, there was less Indian Food in the movie than I would have liked. I expected to come out of the theater craving some Palak paneer, but I think a fine dining experience may have been more appropriate.

I won't give anything away, but I will say that Helen Mirren was delectable as usual, and her banter with Om Puri was a lot of fun. The movie does stray quite a bit form the narrative and ending of the book, but you should't let that stop you from consuming this film as if it were one of Hassan's meals. Go hungry, though, and plan to eat something really good afterward. Your palette will be inspired.

Wednesday, August 27, 2014

Next Level Spinstering: Needlework

Last night, while watching Wheel of Fortune and pondering Vanna White's hair because it looked like a wig, I realized I had taken spinstering to the next level. Not only was I wishing Antiques Roadshow aired on Tuesdays, but I was also working on the same needlepoint project I'd been creating since before I went to Mexico. The cherry on top? I was wearing a giant cat tee shirt.

Now, as you may know, the word "spinster" comes from the work of spinning yarn or thread, which was often done by unmarried women in order to support themselves. I wasn't spinning thread, but I was certainly using it. In fact, I had a bun on top of my head, and I was wearing glasses. All I needed, really, was a rocking chair.

Several of my other single lady friends, I have discovered, are also into needlework. This is how, on Saturday night around 9pm, I ended up at Hancock Fabrics buying needlework supplies with a friend who's into cross stitching. We went there after dinner, and when we had purchased our goods, we went our separate ways to resume our stitching.

While I'm completely aware that spending my nights and weekends pushing and pulling a needle and thread will not further any sort path out of spinsterhood, I can really understand why it became a spinsterly pastime in the first place. It's calming, it's easily done while watching TV or listening to the radio (or victrola if we're talking history), it's time consuming (what else were ladies of old going to do if they didn't have a date?), and it feels productive. Bonus: When I'm finished with the needlepoint, I can turn it into a pillow for my sofa, where I already spend most of my time anyway.

So, if you, too, are ready to really spinster out this week, perhaps you should consider cross stitch, needlepoint, or embroidery. I must say, all three are quite satisfying.