Friday, October 31, 2014

Happy Halloween and #FAFATL!

happy-halloween-gif, black-cat-gif
It just wouldn't be right for me to celebrate Halloween without a cat gif. So. Here you go! I'm glad we took care of that right off the bat.

Halloween is my favorite holiday. It has all of the things I like: costumes, candy, and cats. Add in a some carry out, and you've pretty much got the four C's of spinsterhood. What's not to like?



AND, since Halloween falls on a Free Art Friday this year, I've made some black and neon little cat magnets. They're not glow in the dark, but I think they're sort of spooky anyway. As always, if you're in the Atlanta area, be sure to check my instagram throughout the day to see where I've posted these baby kitties!

Last of all, since it is Halloween, I thought I'd share the costume I made this year. I was a mermaid for my church's trunk or treat, and I even manned the face painting table. I made this costume from a nude Merona tank top, a green maxi skirt with a wonky hem I bought on Amazon (it said it was a medium, but unless they meant medium way between a child and an adult, I'm not sure what they were talking about...), three packs of sequins, one pack of rhinestones, two large bottles of blue glitter puff paint, four bottles of tulip green glitter puff paint, one tube of E6000 glue, and several Netflix documentaries. I quite liked the results.

I probably won't wear the skirt again, but I'm quite tempted to start wearing this shell cami all over town. I mean, why not, right?

Well, happy Friday to all of you, and I hope you're having an excellent Halloween. Eat candy for breakfast. It's the breakfast of champions...er...champion spinsters.

Here's hoping you're also playing with a jack-o-lantern full of baby black kittens.

Thursday, October 30, 2014

Thursday Fun: Taylor Swift Coloring Page

taylor-swift-black-and-white, taylor-swift
You've made it through the wilderness of Wednesday, and now I think it's time you had some spinsterly fun. If you're spinstering like I am this week, then you've probably been listening to Taylor Swift's new album pretty much nonstop. But alas, the new album can only occupy your ears. Perhaps you're in search of a little more of a full-emersion Taylor Swift experience. That is why I've created this Taylor Swift coloring page.

The coloring page should print out nicely on an 8.5x11 piece of paper, and you can color her to your heart's content. I know I should have added some cats to the background, but I figured if you were really gonna get creative, you could draw those in yourself!

I've decided Taylor Swift and I should be friends, so if you happen to know her, please feel free to direct her to The Spinsterhood Diaries so we can meet. I'm hoping this first offering of a coloring page will earn me some points toward also meeting her fabulous cats. As a bonus, she can have all the diet coke because I drink regular. So that works out nicely.

As always, if you're particularly proud of your work, please do share on The Spinsterhood Diaries Facebook Page! I love to hear from you!

Wednesday, October 29, 2014

Spinster Jams: A Playlist To Get You Over The Hump

It's Wednesday, and if you're one of those pesky glass-half-full people, then that means your work week is halfway through! If you are, like I am, one of those there-are-four-inches-of-liquid-in-this-glass people (well, pragmatists, really), then you know you've still got half a day until you're really halfway through the week. After lunch you'll be over the hump. Until then, though, you may need a little help making it through. That's why, m'lady, I've made you a playlist.

Now, I know that not everyone likes a playlist or has the same taste in music as I do, but anyone who spends as much time trying to tune out background noise so they can focus as I do sometimes needs a little break from the podcasts and books on tape. So, if you do like an upbeat dance-inducing playlist, then I've made a kind of girl power/sassy playlist just for you!

to Listen Blindly, click here: Wednesday Playlist

Or just press play below!


10.30.2014 Playlist by jonezee85 on Grooveshark


Now for the actual list of songs:

1. "Secrets" - Mary Lambert
2. "Do My Thing" - Estelle featuring Janelle Monae
3. "Countdown" - Beyonce
4. "All About That Bass" - Meghan Trainor
5. "Party" - Beyonce Featuring Andre 3000
6. "Independent Women" - Destiny's Child
7. "Shake It Off" - Taylor Swift
8. "Can't Hold Us Down" - Christina Aguilera
9. "Pretty Girl Rock" - Keri Hilson
10. "Killin' It" - Cher Lloyd
11. "Bossy" - Kelis Featuring Too $hort

Enjoy! I hope this gets you dancing at your desk!

Tuesday, October 28, 2014

Still My Spirit Animal: Taylor Swift's New Album

Taylor-Swift-Drawing, Taylor-Swift-Cute, Taylor-Swift-1989, Taylor-Swift-Is-My-Spirit-Animal, Taylor-Swift-2014
In case you didn't watch the Today Show or any commercials in the past week, I think you should know that Taylor Swift's new album, 1989, dropped yesterday, and according to my Instagram, pretty much everyone preordered it on iTunes. I've only listened to the album twice so far, but it won't surprise you to know that I like it. I like it quite a bit.

Now, according to quite a few things I've read around the internet, Taylor Swift's last album, Red, was written almost solely about her relationship and breakup with one Mr. Jake Gyllenhaal. A few of the songs on this album still seem to bear echoes of that relationship, which I think is fairly true to life and accurate. You don't just write an album about a guy and then sing it all over the world on tour and magically become over it.

As much as I do think she's rehashing some of the same feelings, the lady Swift has a totally new feel and attitude on this record than on the last one. Not only is the actual music totally different from the last album (more synthesizers, more playful vocals, more danceability...), but the overall message seems to be something along the lines of "yes, I still love you, but I mean, what am I going to do about it?" The answer, of course is that she's just gonna shake it off.

I could write more about this, but I think I need to listen a few hundred more times before I can really make a serious (and unqualified/uneducated) analysis. For now, I say 'Hooray For Taylor Swift,' and also go listen to the album now.

Monday, October 27, 2014

Spinstergram/Spinster Shopping: You're Welcome

mrs.-claus-costume
Around this time of year every year, it seems I hear everyone talking about how shocked they are that Christmas decorations are already out. I don't know about you, but it doesn't really surprise me anymore. What did surprise me yesterday, though, was when, for Halloween costume reasons, I found myself in Steinmart. I didn't find what I was looking for, but as you can se above, I found something so much better.

While I was wandering the round racks, looking for a beige top of some sort that costed next to nothing (you can never find it when you need it most), I discovered this insane/delectable gem. Yes, Ladies, this Santa Sweater was hanging on a rack with several of its kind in full sincerity and seriousness. Not only was this sweater there, but there were various and sundry other christmas sweaters. Steinmart really isn't the kind of place that carries ironic clothing, so I'm going to hazard a guess that this thing is for real.

I snapped a photo of the sweater and sent it to Megan, letting her know this was available whenever she got a chance to come find one in her size. Megan's response was "This is very nice." I then suggested Megan wear it on her next date, to which she responded that it couldn't possibly make anything worse. At that point, I was laughing to myself amidst seasonal sweaters while thinking "this is why we're friends."

Now, later I was talking to my mom on the phone, and I told her about the sweater and how I planned on wearing it on the next date I procured from the online dating arena (yes, I have unfortunately fallen back into that abyss.) My mom said she thought I should bring a santa sack with me that had my phone number on it. Before the date, she said,  I should just send a quick message saying, "I'll be the one in the Santa suit. See you soon!"

After all this giggling, I thought it only fair to note a few things: Firstly, I have just discovered that Steinmart has an Ecommerce site (linked above in the first paragraph). Secondly, this sweater is available for purchase on their website along with several other really spectacular options. Thirdly, I acknowledge that not everything at Steinmart is a Santa Suit, and quite a few things there are date appropriate. Fourthly, I also acknowledge that Christmas sweaters are fun.

So, in conclusion, if you need a last minute idea for your Halloween costume and/or hot date, I think you've got a front runner here. You're welcome.

Sunday, October 26, 2014

Atlanta Spinstering: The Country Living Fair

Some miniature Halloween candy buckets at the Country Living Fair
Two weekends ago, my mom texted me that the Country Living Fair would be in Stone Mountain Park, here in Atlanta this weekend. I love a good fair, so I couldn't resist. My mom couldn't make it, but thankfully my friend Sara was up for an adventure!

The Country Living fair is put on by Country Living Magazine, and in Sara's words, it looks like every southern woman's Pinterest and Etsy came to life. There were booths of crafts and wares, a giant pile of pumpkins and gourds, food vendors, and - my favorite part - remodeled camping trailers.

Sara and I couldn't have gone on a nicer day. The weather was sunny and just the slightest bit warm for the Uniqlo sweatshirt I chose to wear. We started with a few of the remodeled trailers, and I have to say, I was more than impressed. The first one had both indoor and outdoor kitchens, though I think it was nearly factory fresh. The next, however, was a ladylike vintage pink-and-periwinkle mini camper, part of which you'll see pictured here below. I thought my friend Chelsea would have loved it. There were even more excellent renovated campers, but somehow I didn't take photos. I would love to go to an entire show of them, though.

The pink stove in one of the remodeled campers

After marveling at the excellent renovation jobs, Sara and I headed to check out some of the booths. There was a lot of jewelry made of assembled vintage findings, but one of our favorite booths of jewelry was one called Rag Trader Vintage, which featured lots of necklaces, hairpins, rings, and sundry other pieces of jewelry. Among our favorites were a rectangular double watch necklace, a cat cameo, and tiny music box necklaces. (I couldn't find any of theirs online, but here's a link to some similar ones. ) Below you'll find a photo of some of the watch necklaces.

Watch necklaces at Rag Trader Vintage

One of the only purchases I actually made at the Country Living Fair was too delicious not to purchase. There was a table called Pam's Pantry, and there were all these little jars with lucite tops, and when I went closer, I realized they all had little dips in them. I tried a few, and they were all pretty delicious, but the last one I tried was one called "Hog Heaven," and I had to purchase it. And so I did. I purchased a mix, and if we happen to got o the same party any time soon, then you may just get to taste it.

Now that I've revealed that I'm still very much a little piglet, let's just look at some more pictures and try to forget how sick I was earlier this week. 


Above is an arrangement of my favorite earrings at the Country Living Fair. The bottom right ones are my favorite because they look like they have little bananas, but as you can see, they were quite pricey, so alas, I did not purchase them. But how fun are they?





Next you'll see two miniature christmas scenes that had been affixed to the tops of cigar boxes. For some reason, I thought these were so charming. I'm not sure if I'd feel safe actually opening the cigar box with all those things on top, but it's a really cool idea. They also had ones that were on top of cookie tins. Imagine bringing your Christmas cookies to a party in a tin or box like that!



Above are much less festive photos, but I thought there was just something really cool about these vintage metal toys. And finally, I'll leave you with a closeup of the best metal one. The elephant balancing a ball on his nose. 



The Country Living fair was a lot of fun, and I'm very proud I didn't eat more than I did. Happy Sunday!


Saturday, October 25, 2014

Audible Spinstering: Jesus Land

I know, I know. You're tired of hearing about all the audiobooks. Bear with me, though. I was a sick little spinster this week. And, if you'd already read The Glass Castle, then maybe you're hankering for something just as crazy. Well, this could be it!

Today's book was yet another memoir and suggestion from my coworker, David. Let me just start out by saying that Jesus Land: A Memoir is full on sad and insane. It's the story of a girl (Julia Scheeres),  her adopted brother David, and their experiences growing up. A large portion of the book takes place in the Dominican Republic at a reform camp called Escuela Caribe. According to a quick Google search, Escuela Caribe is also the subject of a documentary called Kidnapped for Christ, one of whose co-executive producers was none other than Lance Bass.

So, if you're not scared of a little shock and sadness, then I say go for it. I couldn't tear myself away. I'm pretty sure I've only ruined it for you a little.

Friday, October 24, 2014

#FAFATL 5: Black Cats!

Hooray for Friday! You know what that means: Free Art Friday. Today I've made three little canvases (well, two little canvases and one little canvas board) featuring little black cats. I figured it was both spinsterly (because...cats) and seasonally appropriate with Halloween nearing.

These little magnets lean more toward the "craft" than "art" today because I broke down and used a little puff paint. I just felt like somehow Halloween warranted puff paint. It's not glow in the dark, but it is neon, which I think is always fun and a little spooky.

So happy Friday to you, and if you're in the Atlanta area, keep an eye out on my Instagram to see where you can hunt these little baby kittens down!

Thursday, October 23, 2014

Spinster Sick Day: (not Ebola)

Many of you may know that the CDC is in Atlanta, and two of the first American Ebola Patients were treated at Emory here in Atlanta. As such, I feel like there's a pretty hilarious amount of panic here in Atlanta about Ebola, and I am not immune. That's why, when I found myself stricken with a pretty intense stomach virus on Monday night, I had a fleeting thought that it had happened. Rest assured, though, it was not Ebola. It was, however, pretty intense.

The first night I was sick I couldn't sleep, but ever night and day since I've slept like the dead, like that kind of sleep where you wake up and you're not sure where you are...or even who you are. This kind of sleep, oddly, results in some very coherent dreams. In fact, just before I woke up this morning I had a dream that I bought a horse from my paternal Grandfather, and she was named Virginia Highland. There was no saddle, so I rode her laying on my stomach, and after I'd brushed her mane, she sent me to Target to buy her a list of apple flavored snacks and drinks because she was having her "lady time." Only when I awoke did I realize how much more this made sense than most of my usual dreams.

When I went to the doctor, I also learned about the BRAT diet (Bananas, (white) Rice, Applesauce, Toast), which is what you should eat after a virus like this. I had no idea, and I thought I'd share.

Now that you know way too much about this little illness, I'd like to conclude by saying that I am pleased to have spinstered through it. The last thing anyone wants while they're feeling this way is knowing someone else is hearing them throw up all night.

Wednesday, October 22, 2014

Audible Spinstering: Dad Is Fat


The other day I was reading suggestions on Audible.com, and one of the reviewers was saying they couldn't wait for Jim Gaffigan's new book, Food: A Love Story to come out because they loved Dad is Fat so much. Honestly, the title of the new book was what interested me most. I felt it pretty much summed up my relationship with food as well.  The day I read that review, Food: A Love Story wasn't out yet, so I listened to Dad is Fat.

Now, let me preface all of this by saying that prior to reading this book, I was not familiar with Jim Gaffigan's "Hot Pockets" routine. However, when he kept talking about it in the book, I thought I should check it out, and begin a hot pocket lover myself, I didn't actually think it was that funny. Sigh. I hate to say that. I had such high hopes.

Now onto the book. At first blush, the book seems to be a love song to his wife, Jeannie. But as the book progresses, he talks more about her making him sandwiches and cleaning things up, and I just started to have a bad taste in my mouth about his abilities as a human being. I'm sure he meant to poke  fun at himself here, but it came off as just the slightest bit sexist. You can make your own sandwich, sir.

The rest of the book is less about food and more about the Gaffigans having five kids and less than five beds. You can imagine how after The Glass Castle, this might make me feel a little uncomfortable. However, perhaps that's just because I'm not a parent.

In the end, I decided that perhaps I would have enjoyed this book a lot more if I had kids. As it stands, it wasn't my favorite, which is sad. I usually like comic essays. This collection, though, was not necessarily for spinsters.

Tuesday, October 21, 2014

Audible Spinstering: The Glass Castle

Jeannette-Walls-Face, Jeannette-Walls-Portrait, The-Glass-Castle
The other day I was standing in the Starbucks line with my coworker David, and we got to talking about my Audible.com addiction. David said he was sure I had read The Glass Castle, but that if I hadn't, he thought it'd be right up my alley. Since I hadn't read it, I went directly to my desk and downloaded the book, put my headphones in, and was rapt for the next two days.

Jeannette Walls's The Glass Castle: A Memoir is an insane trip through Walls's childhood with two irresponsible parents and a whole lot of ingenuity. While some of it is sweet or funny, a lot of it leaves me thinking,"there but for the grace of God go I," especially when she talks about her artistic mother. The audiobook is read by Walls, and her voice is astoundingly upbeat throughout. I almost wanted her to be a little more angry about all the crazy things her mostly unemployed parents did. However, no matter what her tone of voice, I must say that David was absolutely right. This book was amazing, and when it was over, I wanted to hear more.

So, if you're looking for a crazy read that will make you really appreciate having stable and productive parents, I highly recommend The Glass Castle. It knocked my socks off, and I think Oprah liked it, too. And David, if you're reading this, thank you. That was an excellent recommendation.

Monday, October 20, 2014

Happy 2nd Spinsterversary!

Well, Spinsters, it's happened. Another year of spinstering has passed, and I'm still here, living it up, and eating breakfast in my bed. I wish I could say that I was finished working on The Spinsterhood Diaries: Year Two, but it is still a work in progress. When the book is available for purchase, I will let you know! This year's will have fun things like coloring pages, a crossword puzzle, a word search, and photos. Hooray!

Now, in honor of another glorious year of spinstering, here's a list of ten reasons to be glad of spinsterhood:

1. The thermostat is always set to what I want.
          That's right. If I want it to be 65 degrees when I go to sleep at night, that's my affair and no one else's.

2. I always choose what movie I see.
          Yep, no stupid man humor movies....unless I want to see them.

3. I control the remote control.
          If I want to watch JTV, I'll watch JTV. If I want to change the channel every time sports are on, I will most certainly do that. If I want to only watch the ice skating portions of the Olympics, I'll do that, too.

4. No one can judge my pants-free lifestyle.
          ...even if my hind quarters are a little lumpier these days.

5. I never have to check in with anyone before spending money.
          So If I buy two pair of Coach moccasins because they make me feel like someone is massaging my feet all day, then that's what I'll do.

6. I can sleep diagonally in my bed
          Sometimes it's necessary.

7. I don't have to talk to anyone in the morning
          I'll never understand how some people can be so chatty before they've been awake for more than two hours.

8. Crafts can take over my whole apartment.
          And, of course, they often do.

9. No one ever has to know how many freezer meals I've eaten this year.
          And on some levels, even I don't want to know.

10. I don't have to share a Netflix Account
          I'd like to keep this relationship exclusive, thank you.

So, ladies, Happy Spinsterversary! I'm so glad we're still together.
       

Sunday, October 19, 2014

Spinster Shopping: More Flats!

shopping-for-ballet-flats
As promised, I'm back with more shoes today. However, for those of you who aren't as into shopping, I promise this'll wrap up the flats shopping for the time being.

Most of the picks from today are under $100, but for a few, I had to go a little over...or perhaps a lot over. In any case, maybe you're looking to buy yourself a little luxurious treat. And why shouldn't you? You're a lady, and your feet are pretty slow to gain or lose any weight...so...you can even wear your shoes while you eat all the pizza rolls.

Now, the moment you've been waiting for. Prices and links below!

1. Adriana Papell Zoe Rhinestone Flat: Lord and Taylor, $99

2.Enzo Angiolini Carolin Flats: Lord and Taylor, $59.99

3. Twin-Set Simona Barbieri: Yoox, $131

4. Halogen Kayla d'Orsay Flat: Nordstrom, $79.95

5. Printed Leather Pointy Ballet Flat: Zara, $79.90

6. MIA Abi Flat: 6pm, $23.70

7. Scalloped Laser-cut Ballet Flats: Charlotte Russe, $22.99

8. The D'Orsay Flat in Spot Dot: Madewell, $74.99

9. Viv printed Flats: J.Crew, $149.99

10. Milla Scallop Flat: Loeffler Randall, $295

Saturday, October 18, 2014

Spinster Shopping: Bows For Your Toes

bow-ballet-flats, shopping-for-ballet-flats, goes-for-your-toes
The other day, I posted a ballet flats coloring page, and one of you delightful readers said you were hoping it was a shopping guide. Well! Your wish is my command! I've searched the internet for some pretty fancy footwear! I found so many shoes, though, that I'm going to split this into two different posts. Check back here tomorrow for more cute flats.

Now, without any further ado, I'll tell you where you cans find all these  lovely ladies. Many of them are pretty pricey, but there are some that'll fit a few tighter budgets...check them out!

1. Blue by Betsey Johnson Ballet Flat: Amazon, $99.95

2. Sequin Ballet Flats: Zara, $59.90

3. Hope 1967 Ballet Flats: Yoox, $129

4. Twin-Set Simona Barbieri Ballet Flats: Yoox, $127

5. Ballet Flats: H&M, $24.95

6. Leather Ballet Flat With Bow: Zara, $59.90

7. Nude Bling Bow Pumps: Dorothy Perkins, $20

8. Vanessa Flat: Tory Burch, $295

9. Bloch Women's Min Ballet Flat: Amazon, $195

10. Kate Spade General Bow D'Orsay Flats: Shopbop, $258

Don't forget to come back tomorrow for more cuteness!

Friday, October 17, 2014

#FAFATL 4

#FAFATL, Cat-painting
Hooray for Friday! And, since I've been enjoying participating in #FAFATL so much, I'm more excited for this day of the week than ever!

Above you'll see three miniature paintings I made for this week's drops. I used actual miniature 2" canvases this time instead of 2" canvas boards, as I think everyone agrees they are nicer.

I added a little extra spinsterliness in one of this week's paintings with a cat face. I hope it is collected by a cat lady and put on the freezer part of her refrigeration unit, where she keeps all her Talenti and Amy's Meals.

To follow the postings throughout the day, check in with my Instagram!

Happy Friday!

Thursday, October 16, 2014

Spinster Love: Serial

sarah-koenig-serial, serial-podcast, sarah-koenig-face, sarah-koenig-portrait, sarah-koenig-npr
No, friends, that's not a typo. While I do love cereal, that's not what we're talking bout today. Today, friends, we're talking about a new podcast called Serial, and it is good. 

If you're a huge fan of This American Life like I am, you've perhaps noticed that ol' TAL has been a little light on new content for several months now. It's pretty upsetting, especially if you, like I, have listened to all the old episodes already. So, when a few weeks ago, Ira Glass announced that This American Life would be presenting its first spinoff series, I was ready.

The spinoff is called Serial, and it's narrated by veteran TAL alum Sarah Koenig. Every week there is a new installment to an ongoing investigation into a murder case. Koenig interviews all sorts of parties that are involved in the story either directly or tangentially. There've been three episodes so far, and I'd like them to be coming faster! I cannot wait to hear what happens next.

So, if you're in the mood for some real life Law and Order (because, who isn't?) perhaps you should check out Serial. I'm counting the days until the next episode is available.

Wednesday, October 15, 2014

Wednesday Fun: Ballet Flats Coloring Page

shoes-coloring-pate, coloring-page, free-coloring-page, printable-coloring-page, fashion-coloring-page
It's Wednesday, and we're all halfway through the work week. So, in honor of this halfway point, I thought I'd let you in on a little bit of what it feels like to be a fashion design. Behold! The Ballet Flats Coloring Page!

Of course, these shoes are mostly designed, but you can take your crayons, colored pencils, markers, or whatever you like to color them in and add prints, patterns, glitter, rhinestones, or whatever other details you'd like! I can't say you'll be able to actually have these made into real shoes, but you could scan them in and have them put on a tee shirt or a tote bag. Or perhaps you'd just like to put your finished page on your refrigerator. Whatever you do with your finished product, I hope you enjoy the process.

Now, go forth and print your coloring page! Today's will fit on an 8.5" x 11" page quite nicely. If you particularly love your finished product, share it with me on The Spinsterhood Diaries Facebook Page! Enjoy!

Tuesday, October 14, 2014

Spinster PSA: Pronunciations

When you're a spinster, you've got some extra room in your brain that's not occupied by a boyfriend. Ever since I found out about Ryan Gosling's baby, I've had a lot of free space to focus on things that I'm fairly sure don't bother anyone else.

What, exactly, am I talking about? Well, friends, I'm talking about pronunciations. Whenever someone mispronounces a word in my presence (most likely in a situation where it's inappropriate for me to openly say anything about it) I like to figure out a way to say it correctly in the next sentence. However, I've noticed this tactic does not work. In fact, I've noticed the exact opposite. The person most often will say the word incorrectly again and again and again...as if they're rebelling against correct pronunciation. Each time it happens, it's all I can think about.

So, I thought I'd help everyone out today. I found some handy dandy pronunciation guides on Youtube and around the web. Below, I'll embed them for your listening convenience. I'm sure you, dear readers, are not the mispronunciation culprits...but in case you are, just watch the videos, and no one has to know.

1. Supposedly (not supposABLY)


2. Regardless (not irregardless)


3. Birthday (not BirFday)


4. Alzheimer's (not old timer's)

5. Gradation (not Grad-ee-ation) Unfortunately there's not a video for this one, but click the link here, and then click on the speaker.

6. Concur (not conquer...that's a different word.)


7. Weary, Leery, and Wary are three different words.

8. Chipotle (not chipOLTAY)


9. Nuclear (not nuke-you-lar)
10. Gyro (not jye-row)...ok, this one doesn't bother me as much...but still.




Now that I'm finished ranting and chastising, I'm sure we can all agree I should doodle more and potentially listen less. No one should be this bothered by pronunciation. My gosh, I need a cat.

Monday, October 13, 2014

Spinster Screening: Gone Girl

rosamund-pike-gone-girl, gone-girl, rosamund-pike-illustration, gone-girl-illustration
A few months ago I listened to Gone Girl as an audio book. If you read that post, you know that book wasn't my favorite. However, when I found out it was coming out as a movie (and Tyler Perry was in the cast...as a man), of course I had to see it.  So, yesterday, without makeup and in grand spinster style, I took myself to the North Dekalb Mall for a look at what a movie with Ben Affleck and Tyler Perry looks like.

For those still considering seeing this movie, I must say that it, like the novel, is quite...graphic. In fact, i thought that was one of the sort of unnecessary parts of the book in the first place. There was a bit of gratuitous language, sex, and violence. Honestly, though, the violence is kind of the least of your worries.

All told, though, the story is a pretty cool and suspenseful one. If you haven't read the book, the story will probably blow your mind a little. However, I won't spoil the movie for you...yet. That'll come later, and I'll warn you.

Now, let's talk about the casting. Mostly, i just want to talk about Rosamund Pike. I looked at her IMDB, and it seems I haven't seen anything she's been in since the early 2000's. That doesn't matter, though. She was great in this. And let's take a moment to think about her perfect, smooth, face cream commercial skin. I'd just really like to know how I could get some skin like that.

Ben Affleck's skin is less impressive, but I daresay he's come an incredibly long way since Gigli. The only thing I will say about his performance, though, is that he managed to be more likable in the movie than Nick actually was in the book. I don't really suppose that's his fault, though. If I were making this movie, I wouldn't want the audience to hate all the characters as much as they did in the book.

Even though Tyler Perry wasn't a huge role in this one, I had to just give him a mention. He was actually not distracting at all in this movie. Generally I find him to be a little hammy and attention-seeking, but he actually played it straight this time, and I approved.

Now, for the last part...

***Warning! Spoilers Below!***

There was a lot of talk about this movie before it came out, saying that the ending was a little different from that of the book. As much as everyone talked about this, I somehow expected the actual outcome to be different. Instead, the ending was only slightly different, and was, in effect, in keeping with the overall mood and spirit of the novel.

***Spoiler Over***

In conclusion, if you want to go see this, you need to consider a few things before you go. Firstly, I need you to remember that it's graphic. Secondly, if you do go see this, keep an eye on Rosamund Pike's beautiful face and skin. Third, there's language. It's not just cursing, it's the content of the language. Fourth, Tyler Perry's in it, but don't be scared.

Ok, now you know. Make your decision. My final thought is this: This is probably one of the most accurate adaptations of a book I've ever seen (besides the ending).

Sunday, October 12, 2014

Spinster Love: Stuff You Should Know

sysk-podcast, stuff-you-should-know-illustration
While I do love a good audio book, sometimes I like to take a break and listen to a podcast. Since I've been logging quite a few hours in front of my work computer, I asked my friend Sara for some suggestions. She responded with this little tidbit of information: There's a podcast called Stuff You Should Know, and it's taped just a few buildings over from where I work in Atlanta. Apparently, this podcast is actually more popular than This American Life in Canada. Who knew!?

I started in on an episode about Panic Attacks, and before I knew it, a week had passed, and I'd learned about Death Masks, the weirdest ways to die, Police Interrogations, and all manner of other things. This show is addictive.

While Stuff You Should Know is educational (or potentially infotaining),  one of my favorite parts is actually when they read listener mail. This, most often, is off-topic or refers to a previous episode, but I love it. I feel I would be remiss in my duties, though,  if I did not warn you of the mispronunciation that runs rife though out the podcast. I'll give them a pass on this because the hosts seem like really likable guys, but it must be said...they do not seem to pre-google their pronunciations.

So, if you find your ears itching for something new to hear, try Chuck and Josh from Stuff You Should Know. I quite like them, and I'm proud to be their office neighbor!

Saturday, October 11, 2014

Spinstergram: I'm Back!

Well, spinsters, It's been a week, and I'm back with photos. I know, I was hoping I'd make an illustration last night, but I was too engrossed in relaxation to take care of that. Sigh. Tomorrow is another day. Instead, today I'm sharing three photos from this week!

The first photo was the only #FAFATL I made this week. I had started it a couple weeks ago, and I finally poured the last layer of resin when I couldn't sleep one morning. And it was claimed! I always feel like it's an exciting treasure hunt.

This second image is this creepy patchwork horse I saw in Blowing Rock, NC while celebrating my mom's birthday. It really freaked me out, so of course I had to share. 



Now, this last image is of a monkey painting at The Gilded Lily, also in Blowing Rock. It's a monkey wearing a polka dotted bow and a green dress and holding an oversized pencil. I really wish this painting was hanging at my desk. 

Well, hooray for Saturday! I'm off to celebrate surviving this week with a ladies' brunch! 


Friday, October 3, 2014

#FAFATL 3 and See You Soon!

Hooray for Friday! As if we needed any more reasons to be excited about Friday, in Atlanta it's Free Art Friday! Today I've got three mini paintings I'll be posting around Atlanta (probably near my office since I won't have time to do much else). However, check my instagram all day to see when and where I post them!

Now for some more somber news. It's really really busy time right now at work, and I need to put my attention there. So, starting today, you'll have a chance to catch up on a little bit of your spinsterly reading. Might I suggest you give yourself a little giggle by perusing the gif section of The Spinsterhood Diaries? Or perhaps you'd prefer to listen to some playlists? If none of this appeals to you, I must tell you that both Call the Midwife and Malcolm in the Middle are on Netflix, so...I mean...you may not leave your home until I get back. Both are incredible in totally opposite ways.

So, my friends, I will see you all back here a week from tomorrow, when I will hopefully have decompressed and  had some meaningful spinsterly thoughts. Until then, look for today's #FAFATL finds!

Thursday, October 2, 2014

All I Want is My Macaroni

We're in our busy time at work right now, and before I go any further, I must say that after tomorrow's post, I'm going to have to take a little breakski until things calm down a little. But we'll talk about that further tomorrow. For now, we need to talk about Macaroni.

I made this illustration just before I left work last night with a teal sharpie. It was 8:45 PM, and I hadn't even thought about doing an illustration for today's post. Not only that, but I had opted out of ordering dinner at work because I didn't think I would be there that long. Well. Silly me. I was getting things done, and time just slipped away.

While I worked,  I had been dreaming of eating an Amy's Rice Mac and Cheese that was waiting for me in the freezer, just twiddling its little macaroni thumbs. I couldn't wait to pop it in the microwave for four minutes, stir it while some of it was still ice, and then put it back in for three more minutes. I couldn't wait to eat that little brown bit of cheese that gets burned because my old microwave heats unevenly. I couldn't wait for the warm, gooey, cheesy umami of it all.

I talked to my mom on the phone on the way home so I could finally wish her a happy birthday.  It seems she didn't even eat dinner on her own birthday. She didn't seem particularly sad about it, but readers, this is a crying shame. Please everyone send her dinner because she deserves it.

Once I was safely inside the door, I shed the intense encumbrance we all know as pants, and I opened the magnificent tundra that is my freezer. Some coffee grounds fell out because that's how I roll, but once my grubby little paws found that green cardboard box, my night was ready to begin.

I poured some resin during the first round of microwaving, and during the second, I poured some white grape juice. Then, it was off to bed with me in the unicorn tee from my bathroom floor. I covered my legs but not my feet with the comforter and ate from the TV tray I'm not sure how I ever lived without. Then, I wrote this post.

Nightly spinstering: complete.

Wednesday, October 1, 2014

Tyler Perry's Having a Baby

tyler-perry-as-a-woman, tyler-perry's-baby
The other day I was perusing twitter, and I saw that Tyler Perry was trending. I have watched my fair share of Tyler Perry productions (thought I must say I'm not quite sure I "get it"), so of course I navigated over to see what all the tweets were about. It appears, dear spinsters, that Tyler Perry is having a baby. Now, I suppose the correct term would be "has fathered a baby," but when I think of Tyler Perry, I have to wonder if he is both the child's mother and father.

All of this was conjecture, of course, until yesterday when Tamron Hall was interviewing Perry about the premier of the film adaptation of Gone Girl, and she coyly asked about any other debuts Perry may have in the works. He was trying to be shy about it, but I think we all know Tyler Perry wants us to know about any production in which he's involved.

So, I had to make this into a gif. I know, I'm not great at photoshopping beards out. Who knew that was tough?

I'd like to go ahead and make the same joke I've been trying to make about this all week. No one seems to think it's funny but me. But I DO. So...now that I've built it up so much, here is the text of Tyler Perry's upcoming birth announcement:

"Tyler Perry Presents A Tyler Perry Baby created by Tyler Perry and a woman (played by Tyler Perry)"

Is it just me, or did anyone else (apparently wrongfully) assume that Tyler Perry was just...Tyler Perry, an island unto himself? I had no idea he was into other human beings at all, women or men. What a sneaky little Devil!

My googling has, thus far, proven inconclusive as to the actual due date of Perry's Baby, but I assure you Atlanta will be all about it.

Now I shall leave you to stare at this gif in perpetuity.