Friday, July 31, 2015

#FAFATL: A Roller Skate and A Leftover

Friday! Of course this means it's Free Art Friday. Last week I had three magnets, and I only posted two. So, I'm being lazy and using the leftover one form last week as one of this week's magnets. Sorry not sorry. It's been a long week. 

However, the new magnet for this week is a roller skate  with some really amazing glitter in the background. It reminds me of the skating rink we used to go to when I was little. It was called Skate Galaxy, and I'm fairly sure it's no longer in existence. I once saw a woman's earlobe ripped in half there by the weight of her earring. Just in case you wanted to know that. 

Keep an eye out on Instagram for the hashtag #FAFATL. If you want to see where I drop these two magnets, you can always follow my Instagram: @Jonezee85.

Happy Friday! 

Thursday, July 30, 2015

Audible Spinstering: Shirley Jones is #NSFW

So, first, let me say that this post is not actually NSFW. It's going to be tame. Now that that's out of the way, we can talk about my most recent listen, Shirley Jones: A Memoir.

On the way home from work one day, I heard the tail end of an interview with Shirley Jones about her recently-published memoir. I'll admit that I didn't remember who Shirley Jones was at first, but when they mentioned The Partridge Family, I figured it out. However, I didn't realize she was the same woman who played Marian the librarian in the movie version of The Music Man. I think it was the hair that threw me off. So, curious, I purchased the audiobook.

Now 81, Jones narrates her own memoir, and some of the things she says will definitely surprise you. The book starts out with sort of an explanation of who Jones is and how she got her start on Broadway and then in Hollywood. That story is pretty insane. Some people have all the luck. The story of her career in TV, movies, and on the stage is not the crazy part, though. The crazy part is Jones's private life.

I won't spoil anything for you, but she does describe her first husband, Jack Cassidy (father of both David and Shaun Cassidy), as her "sexual Svengali" more than once. There are...details. Perhaps they're not the kind of details you'll expect, but they're details nonetheless. And this woman is eighty-one years old, ok? But I take full responsibility for having purchased and listened to the book. The end, though, is really something...special. She talks about her current, shall we say, preferences.

So, I'm not sure I can fully recommend this one. However, if you're interested in the life of Marian the Librarian or perhaps want to hear the same story of David Cassidy's first impressions of Jones twice (same story twice in the book...), then go for it! I will say it is amazing because the book shows how different from her roles on the stage and screen are from her life. So, I suppose I'm saying she's an excellent actress and a freaky senior citizen.

Tuesday, July 28, 2015

Tuesday Spinstering: Sending a Birthday Package

This morning I'm posting extra late because I've been making the above little insert for my friend Chelsea's birthday package. Today's her birthday, so she'll be getting this package belatedly, but sometimes those are they most fun. I like to think they just make your birthday last longer. 

I'm not going to ruin her surprise by posting the contents of the package here, but I did have to sort of  have to explain some of the contents on the back of the insert.

Now, if you're looking for some gift ideas this morning, I've just added a bunch of new pins to my "Gift Ideas" board on Pinterest. (No, chelsea, I didn't get you any weird kitchen tools - your'e safe.) 

Enjoy! And have a happy Tuesday, even if it's not your birthday.

Monday, July 27, 2015

Miranda is the Best and the Cutest

Anyone who knows me in real life knows that I'm obsessed with my dog. I love her. She's the best dog ever and also the cutest ever. She's also the sweetest. So, today you should color her. Because that would be the best, sweetest, cutest coloring page. 

Now, of course I'm biased. She's my dog, and I love her. (side note: when I typed that, I accidentally wrote "I love Cher." That made me laugh a little.) In case you need some supporting evidence, though, I've got a precious story for you from this weekend.

I'm turning thirty in less than a month. As such, of course it's time for me to purchase my first pair of roller skates since childhood. So, after some research, I purchased a pair of vintage quadline roller skates from Play It Again Sports for $25. Roller blades are cool now in a sort of ironic way, but I really wanted the OG roller skates. 

Armed (or legged?) with my new skates, I decided I should take Miranda for a walk. This was not such a good idea. For one thing, roller skating outside of a skating rink at any age past, say, 12, is a hazard to your health. Parking lots aren't equipped with rubber floors. For another, Miranda was scared of the roller skates. 

I managed to stay upright for about ten minutes, and then the inevitable happened. I rolled right into the curb and promptly lost my balance. 

Now, I can't remember the last time I fell all the way down. I think it was when I fell running early in the Morning in New York. Alas, I am a little old and a lot fatter than when that happened, and boy, could I feel it. Once I was on the ground, I decided it would be best if I stayed there for a little while, mustering the strength to unlace my skates. 

Miranda, seeing what had happened, came to the rescue, putting her two front paws on my arm and keeping guard until I was able to right myself. She also contributed a few kisses to my cheek. 

I'm writing this post from the parking lot pavement as we speak, where Miranda has been keeping a constant vigil until I'm able to stand once again. No, just kidding! We finished our walk, and I thankfully have no broken bones. Miranda, though, has come out of this experience more loved than ever before. Because she is the best.

Now color her!

Sunday, July 26, 2015

Coloring Page and a Story

abstract-coloring-page, fun-coloring-page, free-coloring-page

Well, good morning! I'm writing this post as I wait for one side of my rice cakes to cook. If you're in the mood for a bit of coloring today, you can print this one out on 8.5 x 11 paper, and go to town!

Earlier this week, I had a spinster screening of Trainwreck. If you're not easily offended by raunchy female-centric humor (for a change), then the facial expressions alone in this movie will have you in stitches. However, that's not what I wanted to tell you this morning.

Trainwreck is rated R, and when I went to have my ticket torn, the guy didn't card me. When I jokingly asked why he hadn't carded me, the girl standing next to him kind of snorted. I've officially become one of those cheesy people who asks why they weren't carded even though it's clear they're a senior citizen. 

I went to the concession stand to get a drink, and when I looked at the girl, I was like "whoa! Does your sister work here?"

The girl told me her sister didn't work there, and kept ringing up my order. FYI: They have a coke freestyle machine at the North Dekalb Mall movie theater. So...

Surprised, I said, "really!? That girl up front looks just like you." Then, the girl looked at me quizzically, almost as if she thought I was kidding.

"That was me..." she said. "I'm just really fast."

It's been three days since this happened, and I'm still laughing. 

Enjoy your Sunday!

Saturday, July 25, 2015

Ice Cream Coloring and some Links

adult-coloring-page, free-coloring-page

It's Saturday, and I think you should be working toward your best Ice Cream Sundae. OR, maybe today's the day you try an ice cream cone with more than one scoop. I don't think I've ever actually done that, but it looks so cool. So maybe I'll check that out today.

If you aren't checking out ice cream today, perhaps you'd like to check out some link

1. I slept for twelve hours last night (I know!), and I could really have used this tee...since the first thing I did once inside my apartment was remove my pants. (Adios Pantaloons Tee)

2. Still thinking about that ice cream sundae? Well, Buzzfeed has made a list of 40 ways to make an Amazing ice Cream

3. I found this list of helpful websites on Pinterest, and I still haven't made it to the bottom yet. However, it has one that will make QR codes, and I think that's really cool. 

4. I sent this article on freelancing to no less than three creative friends on Thursday, and now I'm sharing it with you. I found it really interesting and suspect it's very helpful. (6 Things I Wish I Knew Before Starting A Freelance Business)

5. This Yasss tee shirt is on my Birthday list. Size Large Please. Thank you.

6. Lorien Stern on Etsy rocks my world. Check out a whole lot more of her work here.

7. Need a craft today? Make a DIY Guess Who game of your friends, pets, and family.

8. You know that Pinterest board you have for gift ideas? (If you don't have one, you should make one. It makes Christmas shopping so much easier.) Add this book about Dad Dancing to that board. You can thank me later. Dads are so hard to shop for.

9. According to her Tumblr Profile, Valerie Kao is only seventeen years old. Are you kidding me? She should be teaching a PhD program in digital painting and illustration. My jealousy knows no bounds.

10. Porcelain Animals from Ingredients For Lovely are just about the most adorable thing I've ever seen. Buy yourself some plain chains, and add this to your gift ideas Pinterest board for later.

11. And if you're still thinking about that coloring page, you can find it and many more in The Spinsterhood Diaries Summer 2015 Coloring book. I'm currently working on yet another one, but this time I may publish through another site. Stay tuned, and if you have suggestions for a type of coloring book  you'd like me to illustrate, leave a comment below!

Happy Saturday!

Friday, July 24, 2015

#FAFATL: Kisses

Hooray for Friday! Miranda awakened me at 5:40 this morning, and so I am writing this as my eyes try to close. I will beat them, I tell you! Otherwise, I won't be able to watch all the YouTube Videos this morning.

As always, if you want some of these glittery lips or the glittery heart, then follow along with the #FAFATL Hashtag on Instagram or follow me @Jonezee85. I'll be dropping these around Atlanta today, and I'll probably save one for tomorrow, too. 

Now, since it's Friday, I think you should start with an upbeat song. I hate this music video, but the song is so catchy. So, just turn it on, and then navigate to a new window. 

Happy Friday!

Thursday, July 23, 2015

Audible Spinstering: The Girl On The Train

For months my coworker Aly has been telling me I should read Paula Hawkins's The Girl On The Train. had been making the same suggestion, so finally, I purchased the audiobook and set to listening. 

Paula Hawkins's writing is easy to follow, and unlike many other books on tape, I didn't lose my focus while I listened. The book is narrated by three different voice actresses, allowing the reader to differentiate easily between characters. This is an important factor as three of the main characters are women around the same age. 

This murder mystery centers around two men and three women, and unlike most murder mysteries, I had no idea who committed the crime until the very end of the book. With all the Law and Order I've watched in my life, that's really saying something. I'll attribute some of this to the way the plot jumps back and forth in time and from character to character. The rest I'll just go ahead and give to Hawkins for writing a really good mystery. 

So, if you're looking for some good summer reading, I say pick up a copy of The Girl On The Train. I think you'll like it. 

Wednesday, July 22, 2015

Coloring Page: Sneakers

adult-coloring-page,  shoes-coloring-page, coloring-pages-for-adults

It's Wednesday, and I think you deserve to print out a coloring page and go to town. This one's got lots of different little segments to color, so you can pretend you're designing some of those fun multicolored sneakers that came out a few seasons ago. 

Also, something I keep laughing to myself about, and I just have to share. When Sara F and I went to Indie Craft Experience last month, we parked in the parking garage that's next to Underground Atlanta. When we were walking back to the garage, there was a homeless man panhandling. When we walked by him, he started singing "give it to me, I'm worth it," and I loved it. See the video below. 

Enjoy, and have a happy Wednesday. You're worth it.

Tuesday, July 21, 2015

Two Images from Monday Night Spinstering

swimwear-coloring-page, fashion-illustration

In the heat of Atlanta summer, I can barely be bothered to walk outside, get in my car, and drive to work. It's just the overall thickness of the weather. Thankfully, my office is equipped with an excellent air conditioning system, and once I'm there, all is well. After work, I try to spend as little time outdoors as possible so I don't melt into one human puddle. This is why I'm super excited about the Fresh Market that's opened just around the corner from my apartment.

On the way home from work, if I need groceries (though they are more expensive at Fresh Market), I can now arrive at the grocery store making all right turns. Then, when I leave, I can get home making only right turns. In Atlanta Traffic, this seems advantageous. 

Fresh Market is a delight, and I've already been there twice. It's clean, spacious, and shopping there makes me feel like a gourmand. Of course I'm not a gourmand, but they don't have to know that. My favorite thing from Fresh Market so far is the mini coconut macaroon with a  bottom that's been dipped in chocolate. See below. They taste like chewy girl scout cookies, and I find them pretty much irresistible. 

chocolate-dipped-macaroon, coconut-cookie, fresh-market-cookies, fresh-market-macaroon

Last night's spinsterly adventure in Fresh Market yielded a package of these cookies, some Asian Pear Kombucha, a loaf of sourdough bread, some pineapple, and a sesame chicken breast. Not having to cook for anyone really has its perks. 

Back at home, I ate about a quarter of the chicken breast along with a cup of yogurt, a piece of sourdough bread, and a few mini macaroons. Spinsterhood means random dinner, and I'm not ashamed. As I ate, I tried to make sense of Game of Thrones (I'm struggling because everyone looks alike), and made a few fashion illustrations for the next coloring book. 

And that, spinsters, is how to spinster on a Monday night. Stay in the air conditioning, eat, draw, and watch TV. #LivingTheDream

Monday, July 20, 2015

A Note To Monday

I can't believe it's already Monday again. I'm sleepy, and I think this day needs a punch in the face.

Also, I had a dream last night that I lived in a fabulous apartment in New York with a baby grand piano (and the space for it). And then I woke up and went running, and it's so hot in Atlanta that I broke a sweat before I'd even made it down the steps to the ground level. It was 5:30 AM.

Also, this gif looks like it was made on an etch a sketch. I didn't mean to do that. And then, on second thought, I just googled Etch A Sketch Art, and there is some really insane stuff out there. Click the link.

Ok, let's all punch Monday in the face. I hope your day involves copious air conditioning.

Saturday, July 18, 2015

Audible Spinstering: Judy Blume

judy-blume-face, judy-blume-gif, judy-blume-portrait, judy-blume-books, judy-blume-in-the-unlikely-event

The other day I was listening to an episode of Stuff Mom Never Told You, and they were talking about a childhood love of author Judy Blume. I wasn't a big reader as a child, so I had only heard tell of Judy Blume, and mostly as an adult. So, of course I needed to investigate.

I started first with Blume's newest book, In The Unlikely Event. The podcast had described this book as being for an older audience than Blume's previous works. Since I'm not a child, I thought that would probably be a good thing. It was indeed.

Though people may describe In The Unlikely Event as a book for adults, it is written in such a way that anyone older than, say, twelve, would be able to comprehend. This made the book ideal for listening while I worked. The story line was compelling, but I could easily focus on the story and something else. Perhaps, though, the hostesses of Stuff Mom Never Told You meant that the subject matter was a bit more adult. There is definitely some sex in this one, but we're not talking 50 Shades of Grey or anything. Though, now that I think of it, I didn't read that one, so...perhaps I'm not in a position to say. Still, I don't think there will be a media sensation about the graphic nature of a Judy Blume book. It's PG13 at most.

After I listened to In The Unlikely Event, I was curious about Blume's older work. The one I'd heard of most often was Are You There God? It's Me, Margaret. The audiobook was incredibly short, so it was an easy followup. Though I don't necessarily relate to the main subject matter of the story (a girl (Margaret) is anxious to become a woman with all it's physical manifestations - I for one, was not looking forward to that), it was a very pleasant listen. I can see, too, how this would be meant for a much younger audience than Blume's most recent work. 

Now that I've discovered Judy Blume about 20 years after everyone else my age did, I have to say I get it. And I can't promise you won't find me listening to Tales of a Fourth Grade Nothing very soon. 

Friday, July 17, 2015

#FAFATL: Two New Mermaids

As if Friday needed any other reasons to be awesome, it's also the day for Free Art Friday. And this week, I've got two more amateurish mermaid magnets that would very much like to be scooped up from the streets of Atlanta.

As always, you can follow me (@Jonezee85) to see where they're being posted. OR if you want to see all the cool things everyone else is posting, you can check out the #FAFATL and #FreeArtFriday hashtags on both Instagram and Twitter. 

Happy Friday and Happy Hunting!

Thursday, July 16, 2015

Audible Spinstering: Mindy Kaling's Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me?

I can't believe I'm writing about yet another audiobook so soon. Alas, this one was quite short.

If you're American and are older than ten years old, chances are you know Mindy Kaling from her stint on The Office. What you may not know, though, is that she wasn't just on-camera talent on that show. She wore a bunch of different hats, including writer. More recently, you may have watched her on The Mindy Project. I'm not going to lie. I haven't seen that show yet, but lots of my friends really like it.

Kaling's Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me? (And Other Concerns) came out in 2012, and I've been meaning to read it ever since. Now that I have read it, part of me wishes I'd read it in a more timely manner. Some of the things now are not necessarily as timely as they were in 2012. (RE: Kaling mentions how much she respects Amy Poehler and Will Arnett's marriage. They're divorced now.)

Aside from some now-outdated things, this book is a lot of fun. Kaling is unabashedly herself - a fun, intelligent, girly, funny, successful woman who also happens to think very seriously about the members of boy bands. Now thirty-six, she is a single woman who admittedly would like to marry and have children. I like that she said that out loud.

Of course there were a few things in this book with which I disagree, but even if I had written the book myself in 2012, there would still be plenty of things with which I could find fault. There were far more parts I enjoyed, like the section where she talks about not understanding one night stands. Amen, Mindy. Amen.

I could go on, but I think you should read the book for yourself. I laughed aloud several times, and that is always an excellent sign.

Happy Thursday and enjoy!

Wednesday, July 15, 2015

Coloring Page: Some Lamps

adult-coloring-page, coloring-pages-for-adults, home-decor-coloring-page

If you already own The Spinsterhood Diaries Summer 2015 Coloring book, then you've seen today's image. However, if you haven't, here it is! 

My mom really loves lamps. In fact, I've got a lamp in my apartment that she actually made - like, she wired it and everything. It's made of a clay pot we got in the Mountains of North Carolina.

Now, I know this page is a little slanted, but I certainly don't think that should stop you from coloring it!

Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to go sulk about having been awakened from my dream that I was friends with all the Buzzfeed Try Guys

Tuesday, July 14, 2015

Spinstergram: Miranda and some Tomato Aspic

If you follow my Instagram (or Spinstergram as I like to call it), then you've seen both of the images in today's post. However, I love Miranda so much, I had to share this photo. She is so cute I could just eat her. In this photo, I was laying on the couch, and she just felt the need to check out what I was doing. She put her little chin up there, and I died from cuteness. 

Now for something a little less adorable. 

My mom is in town for the America's Mart, and on Sunday night, we went to dinner. I'd seen The Colonnade Restaurant on Cheshire Bridge Road here in Atlanta, and I'd always been curious, so we decided to check it out.

The Colonnade is perfectly retro on the outside, and on the inside, the clientele is...pretty vintage as well. Seeing as this is a southern food/American restaurant, I took that as a good sign. 

Mom and I waited about 20 minutes for a table, and while we waited, we checked out the menu. The fare was much like the now-closed Cole's Restaurant in Sumter, SC, with things like fried chicken, macaroni, mashed potatoes, collard greens, pears and cheese, and an assortment of pies as well. 

Mom saw an item on the menu she knew she wanted: Tomato Aspic. Her aunt, she said, used to make the best Tomato Aspic. Of course I had never heard of this delicacy, so mom explained it to me. It's basically vegetable jello with a tomato base. Yep. That's a thing, you guys. I had no idea.

Our waitress brought the Aspic with the green salad Mom had ordered, and she let me try it. Generally, I consider myself to have quite a broad palette. However, on the grounds of texture alone, I believe I will decline to taste this concoction again. 

The rest of our meal at The Colonnade Restaurant was delightful, especially the rolls and the macaroni and cheese. We ate too much to try the pies, but next time I'll be sure to save room. I give this place two thumbs up, even though they serve a weird jello. It was like a taste of my childhood. 

Monday, July 13, 2015

Monday Spinstering: A Childrenswear Gif

It's Monday, and I've got yet another gif for you guys. This has nothing to do with Monday, but I made it, and so...I'm sharing it. Happy Monday!

Sunday, July 12, 2015

Gifs: Ice Cream Sunday

See what I did there? It's Sunday, and today we're having ice cream gifs, so it's an ice cream Sunday! And yes, I know when we're talking about the dessert, it's actually spelled "sundae."

I just thought today I'd bring some fun gifs and remind you that ice cream exists, and sunday is the perfect day to have some. Now, for the soft serve (my dad's favorite.)

I hope your spinsterly sunday is wonderful, and I hope that you at least consider having some ice cream, soft serve, or Froyo. Enjoy!

Saturday, July 11, 2015

Coloring Page: Ice Cream!

Like a true spinster, I'm writing this post in my bathrobe with a towel on my head. Miranda and I have already been running this morning, and it is so humid here in Atlanta that we might as well have been wading through a swamp. 

If you're as much of a pansy about the heat as I am, then perhaps you'd like to spend your day indoors Netflix binging and coloring a coloring page. Behold! I have just the coloring page for you! It's sweet and it's cool, and it's fun for adults and kids alike. It's Ice Cream (well, and soft serve). This coloring page will print nicely onto an 8.5 x 11 sheet of paper. 

Hankering for more spinster coloring? You're in luck! You can still purchase The Spinsterhood Diaries Coloring Book and The Spinsterhood Diaries Summer 2015 Coloring Book on Now I realize I should work on making a much shorter title for the next one. Noted. 

If you do print this page and color it, please feel free to share your masterpiece with me via Instagram (@Jonezee85) or on the Spinsterhood Diaries Facebook Page. Happy Saturday, happy spinstering, and happy coloring!

Friday, July 10, 2015

#FAFATL: Mermaids!

Hooray for Free Art Friday! My apologies for the low-res photo today. My kitchen does not like me to take photos. 

Today for Free Art Friday, I've made two special Mermaids. In Spanish, the word for Mermaid is Sirena, and I think I might like that word more than "mermaid." Todays' Sirenas are all dressed up and ready to be dropped. They have glitter fins, bust-enhancing tops, and even a little jewelry. 

To nab one of these bathing beauties, make sure to check out the #FAFATL hashtag on Instagram. If you're living in the Atlanta area, follow me @Jonezee85 to see where each mermaid has been dropped!

Happy Friday!

Thursday, July 9, 2015

Audible Spinstering: Aziz Ansari's Modern Romance

I've listened to a whole lot of audiobooks and podcasts lately, but not all of them have been worth mentioning. Taking a break from my true crime binge, though, I decided to go for some comedic nonfiction. On my wish list was Aziz Ansari and Eric Klinenberg's Modern Romance. Since Ansari is a fellow South Carolinian, I knew I must give it a go.

Before I go any further, I have to say that I can't stop staring at this gif. I made it, and it still mesmerizes me.

I expected this book to be somewhere along the lines of Tina Fey, Jim Gaffigan, or possibly even David Sedaris's work. What I found, though, was really surprising. This book is actually a really well-researched book about modern dating and technology.

Ansari is a comedian who talks about dating, so if you're squeamish about some of the language that is often included in such routines, I'll just go ahead and warn you now. That stuff is included. Somehow, he manages to make it more funny and less disgusting than other comedians have in the past. Good on you, Aziz.

I don't want to spoil any of the book's actual contents for you, but I will say this: in the end, I really want to be friends with Aziz Ansari, and not just because he's from South Carolina. And also not because he's got the Momofuku hookup. None of that. He just seems like a really cool guy who eats lots of delicious food.

So, in conclusion, if you're a person in your late 20s or in 30s who is experiencing the perils of dating in this era, I think you'll get a giggle as well as some interesting information from this book. I know I liked it.

Wednesday, July 8, 2015

WIP: Another Mermaid

Spinsters, if there's one thing that last night taught me, it's that I should never go to the grocery store hungry. Generally when I hear this advice I assume it's because going to the grocery store hungry results in a massive purchase. Unfortunately for me, things didn't really turn out that way. Last night I went to the store and bought the following: A dozen eggs, a package of Pepperidge Farm Brussels Cookies, Some Cherries, and a box of nine Bagel Bites. And do you know what I ate for dinner? A little bit of all of it except the eggs. Well, I take that back. There aren't any Bagel Bites left. It's a really good thing I'm not responsible for feeding other humans. Mark that up to another reason it's good to be a Spinster.

What yo use above is a terrifying work in progress. I'm making another Mermaid for Free Art Friday this week. Clearly I have only the skill level of a cave woman when it comes to facial features, but practice makes perfect! Check back Friday to see the finished product!

Tuesday, July 7, 2015

Tuesday Spinstering: Two Random Gifs

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Since I started my Tumblr, I've been trying to make more gifs. You know, to be a content creator and all. Well, today I'm going to share two that I've made recently just for fun. They don't really mean anything or make any real sense, but I made them, so I'm sharing!

The first is quite clearly a tassel necklace gif. Back in 2013, I did a DIY Tassel Necklace Tutorial, in case you're feeling crafty today. Otherwise, you can just watch this necklace make itself.

This next one is just weird...

I don't even remember where I got this original image, but something tells me it was from Madewell or maybe Urban Outfitters. I made it while I was listening to Aziz Ansari's Modern romance. I gave her some plastic surgery, t hen I made her wear the weirdest long johns outfit ever. You're welcome. 

Now, look away before you have a seizure. I should have made the last frame longer.

Enjoy your Tuesday! My friend Amanda has informed me that Monday through Thursday during July is Pinkberry happy hour. That means Frozen Yogurt is half off from five to seven for sizes medium and large! Enjoy!

Monday, July 6, 2015

Sumter Spinstering: Oh! Calcutta

unicorn-clock-old, old-unicorn-clock, oh!-Calcutta, oh!-Calcutta-Sumter-SC, Sumter-SC, Sumter-SC-Shopping
A Unicorn Clock

Aaand we're back! This weekend I took a trip to South Carolina, part of which was spent in Sumter, SC. While there, I decided to visit a store I'm not sure I've entered since high school. The store in question is called Oh! Calcutta, and it's been around for as long as I can remember. First it was in the fabulous Jessamine Mall (now Sumter Mall), then it was next to the Food Lion on Guignard. I think it's had at least one more location before it's current placement, but now it's in the old Curves that shared a parking lot with the now-defunct Sycamore Video. 

The owner of Oh! Calcutta is a man who will gladly tell you that he is from India. This, I'm guessing, is why the store is named Oh! Calcutta, rather than any reference to the theatrical revue of the same name. However, it does neighbor a lingerie store, so...who knows? 

If you visit the store, be prepared to answer a lot of personal questions while you shop. The owner, having been robbed several times (he informed me), keeps a close eye on all customers. I assume he thinks all the questions disguise the fact that he is watching all patrons like a hawk. In any case, he is friendly enough, and the merchandise is so good, it's worth a little unnecessary conversation.

Now, let's talk about what's actually for sale in the store. 

As far as I can tell, some of the merchandise in Oh! Calcutta has been there since its opening. There are racks and racks of tee shirts which are somehow both brand new and vintage. By this, I mean that they've never been worn, but you can tell they're not reproductions. Here, let me show you. 


Here is a Patrick Swayze Tee Shirt. At the time of my visit, Oh! Calcutta was in possession of more than one of these tees. On the same rack, there were Boyz II Men, Paula Abdul, New Kids On The Block, and Guns N' Roses tees, just to name a few. All were brand new, but all were original. I could tell by the puffy printing ink on the New Kids On The Block Tees. It was brilliant!

The tee shirt racks were also home to some real local gems, like this Jessamine Mall Elvis Illusion tee. I'm not sure what this is about, but perhaps Sumter's Mall used to stage performances?

Oh! Calcutta doesn't just have tee shirts in their clothing department. They also have a bunch of jerseys, leggings, baby tees (from the early 2000s), and brand-spanking-new wind suits. Yep, this was just one of the glorious sets. There were several pink and purple options as well as a brilliant Charlotte Hornets number. 

Remember when everyone used to put band posters on their walls? Well, Oh! Calcutta has some of those, too. At this point, they might actually be worth some real money. Maybe it's time to open up that Ebay Seller's account, eh?


I mean, look at this! It's basically a priceless artifact of our country's history. Look at that outfit. Apparently there is an MC Hammer Blog, also, guys. 

There were also lots of oversized buttons. I want to say these were all about 5" across. I don't know where you'd actually put or wear these, but they're kind of amazing. Look at that baby face!

But, alas! Perhaps you prefer something a little more subtle to show your NKOTB pride. That's where these earrings come in. Similar earrings go for almost $8 on Ebay, but at Oh! Calcutta, you can get them for just $4. 

And, since we haven't talked about the unicorn at the top yet, there are some really excellent clocks in that store. They're all sort of resin-coated on planks of wood. In case  you were wondering, there was definitely one with a New Kids On The Block theme. 

Now, if you live in the Sumter area, I guess we all know where you'll be on your lunch break today. Just be forewarned, though. The shop keeper doesn't really care too much about air conditioning. 

Thursday, July 2, 2015

Happy 4th of July Weekend! (see you soon)

Well, Spinsters, while I do not necessarily acknowledge American Independence Day as a major celebratory holiday, I do celebrate the opportunity to PANK it up and see the Monkey Tuta live, in the flesh. What's a Monkey Tuta, you ask? Well, I'll tell you.

When my sister was pregnant, she was still working in an elementary school. When she asked the children what they thought her baby would be, thinking they would all say a boy or a girl, one child announced that the baby would be a "Monkey Tuta!" So, that's one of the names for my niece, who is very good friends with Miranda the puppy.

All of this is to say that I will be taking a break from the blog until next Monday in order to see the Monkey Tuta! Also, I found this board on Pinterest about PANKs

Happy Thursday, you spinsters and PANKs. I will see you soon!

Wednesday, July 1, 2015

#FAFATL: It's Not Even Friday

I know it's not Friday, but since this weekend will be a holiday weekend, I figured I should do a little mid-week drop. Well, that, and I got a little over-zealous with  my sculpted a few nights ago, and now I need to get rid of this monstrosity. Well...maybe it's not a monstrosity. Maybe it's just awkward and lumpy.

If you find my glittery mermaid endearing, and you live in the Atlanta area, keep your eyes peeled today for the drop! You can follow me on Instagram: @Jonezee85. 

Happy Wednesday!